Serva padrona | Ah! Quanto mi sa male
Uberto maakt zich grote zorgen als hij kennis maakt met de zogenaamde geliefde van zijn dienstmaagd Serpina, die in werkelijkheid haar collega Vespone is.
(INSTEAD OF RECITATIVE: “Ah! Quanto mi sa male”)
Serpina stops waving, for unexpectedly Uberto has returned on stage. He looks confused and is clearly at odds with himself. Serpina doesn’t understand and worriedly climbs down the ladder.
SERPINA
(without sarcasm)
What’s the matter? You wanted to spend the evening in proper company.
UBERTO
I ehm… I might have been too… Ehm, I have returned, because… I was probably too…
SERPINA
You wanted to meet my fiancé?
UBERTO
Yes! No!… Is he here?
At that moment Vespone climbs the ladder from behind the backcloth with a helmet and the curtain draped around him like a cloak. Uberto is intimidated by the huge figure rising above him.
UBERTO
(timidly)
Is that… him?
SERPINA
Yes, isn’t he adorable?
UBERTO
He looks so… grim.
SERPINA
Maybe because he’s lost four wives already.
UBERTO
No! Has he?
SERPINA
Yes. They all drowned in the Mediterranean See. Fell overboard on their honeymoon. So sad.
UBERTO
No! Did he… did he…?
SERPINA
Yes, he tried to save them, but alas! My poor, poor, captain Moody. I’ll promise to make you happy again!
VESPINO
(hisses to Serpina)
This is utterly ridiculous. Let me get out of her. He will fire me on the spot.
Uberto retreats to the other side of the stage.
UBERTO
(aside)
She won’t stand a chance with that monster.
SERPINA
(lightheartedly)
He’s promised to take me to Sicily on our honeymoon! Isn’t that sweet?
UBERTO
(sharp)
I won’t let him.
Serpina and Vespone turn to him puzzled.
UBERTO
That man is a maniac. Look at those coldblooded eyes. I wouldn’t spend a second under the same roof with him.
SERPINA
You told me to leave.
UBERTO
But not with him!
He draws his sword.
UBERTO
I won’t let him throw you in the Mediterranean Sea.
VESPONE
(panicking)
He will not fire me, he will kill me!
He wants to climb down the ladder, but Serpina holds him firmly.
SERPINA
(to Uberto)
You won’t stand a chance. Captain Moody is a trained soldier. He fights for a living and he loves to kill.
VESPONE
(to Serpina)
How? I don’t even have a sword!
UBERTO
And I will kill out of love. Tell him that.
He raises his sword and stands ready for the imminent attack.
UBERTO
For I won’t let him marry you.
SERPINA
On what ground, may I ask? You have kicked me out of the house. You have nothing to say about me anymore.
Everybody is eagerly waiting for Uberto to reply, but he’s completely paralyzed by an internal conflict and not able to say a word.
SERPINA
Give me one good reason why I can’t marry him…
VESPONE
(to Uberto)
Yes, why can’t she?
Everybody is anxiously waiting for Uberto’s reaction.
UBERTO
Because you promised to marry me…
Silence. Serpina is touched by his resolution to defend her.
UBERTO
(to Vespone)
So draw your sword or get out of here.
Vespone is frightened and loses his hold on the curtain, that slips back and reveals the servant standing on the ladder. Awkward silence.
UBERTO
(puzzled)
What is this? Was it only a game?
Serpina and Vespone feel embarrassed and evade his glance.